“. . . go home to your family, and tell them everything the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been.”  --Luke 8:39

How can something so simple and natural be so scary at the same time?  For many of us, the very thought of talking about God with our family and friends is loaded with conflicting emotions.  If you’re growing in love and commitment to Jesus in the ways we’ve described in the previous reading, part of you is probably already longing as I Peter 3:15 puts it, to overflow “the hope that you have” into the next tier of your fountain: the people closest to you.  On the other hand, you know your family and you know your friends well enough to recognize they’re all in very different places, spiritually speaking.  Some may be quite receptive and others much less so.

Flinging Seeds

We believe Jesus had your situation in mind as he spoke to a group of his followers along the shore of a lake.

“Listen!  A farmer went out to plant some seeds.  As he scattered them across his field, some seeds fell on a footpath, and the birds came and ate them.  Other seeds fell on shallow soil with underlying rock.  The seeds sprouted quickly because the soil was shallow.  But the plants soon wilted under the hot sun, and since they didn’t have deep roots, they died.  Other seeds fell among thorns that grew up and choked out the tender plants.  Still other seeds fell on fertile soil, and they produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted!  Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand” (Matthew 13:3b-9).

It almost goes without saying that Jesus was talking to people who were intimately acquainted with planting seeds.  Though not all were farmers, most depended on what was growing in their family gardens as a vital part of their daily sustenance.  For many years we’ve been trying to help modern Americans and Europeans—who’ve never planted or watered anything other than their front lawns—to think like first-century Hebrew gardeners.  First off, back then they didn’t just hop in their car and buzz down to the local garden center to pick up seeds.  They collected the seeds from everything they harvested or ate so they could sow the seeds back into the soil for the next season.  Though we spit out the seeds of oranges and watermelons or throw them in the trash without giving them a second thought; Hebrew gardeners always sowed their seeds back into the soil—knowing that today’s seed is next year’s crop.

As Jesus later explained, “The seed,” he was referring to, “is God’s Word” (Luke 8:11).  The Greek word translated as word here is logos, and its etymology is fascinating.  Logos means far more than a collection of characters written on a page or syllables spoken out loud.  Those are things that can get garbled in translation.  Logos means the true essence of what God is actually communicating.  It’s so significant that the Apostle John begins the fourth Gospel using the word three times in a row:  “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God” (John 1:1 NIV). 

God wasn’t content to simply dictate a bunch of words to his prophets or write his laws on stone.  In order to be absolutely, perfectly clear in transmitting his intentions toward you and the whole human race, he came in person to live a life of love and sacrifice.  John 1:15 tells us, “the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us” (NIV).

OK. Back to the seed-sowing parable.  The big idea—the reason we just spent a bunch of time dissecting the history of one word—is that the seed we sow into the lives of others is Jesus, and Jesus’ whole life was about love.

If we’ve chosen to have a relationship with Jesus and his love is present in our hearts, then we can overflow with that love to others.  It’s not our Bible knowledge or amazing evangelistic techniques that make us effective.  Bible knowledge is good and techniques can be helpful, but biblically speaking they are no substitute for Christ’s love.  The Apostle Paul says it unequivocally:

“If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.  If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing.  If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing” (I Corinthians 13:1-3).

Maybe you—and many of your family and friends—have had negative experiences with religious people.  People who have had lots of ideas and spewed doctrine like there’s no tomorrow, but as far as you can tell, they didn’t have love.  It’s hard enough to believe the audacious claims that these people have found “the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6), but without tangible seeds of action—seeds that contain the love of Jesus—it’s nearly impossible.

For more than 20 years we’ve been seeking ways to share Jesus with our family and friends—ways that are genuinely refreshing and that flow naturally into the course of daily life.  You’ll find many of these practical ideas in our other books, especially Irresistible Evangelism (Group Publishing, Inc, 2004), but the real secret is in the seed.  Where there is little seed, there is little harvest.  As you share the Good News of Jesus’ life, if the seed of Christ’s love isn’t clearly evident—so people can recognize it for what it is—don’t be surprised when your family and friends don’t respond positively.

Planted With Love

We’ve conducted a good bit of research to determine what turns people on and what turns them off, spiritually speaking.  One way we conducted this research was to send camera crews out on the streets of major cities to interview ordinary people.  We asked people all sorts of questions trying to discern what they thought of Christians who “evangelize.”  Unfortunately, the most frequent comments we heard contained words like pushy, rude, arrogant, and disrespectful.

Many people related negative experiences they’ve had with folks who didn’t seem to care enough to listen, and who seemed intent on disrespectfully shoving their beliefs down other people’s throats.  Instead of sensing God’s love in those who were sharing with them, what people reported hearing about most was God’s anger.  They heard that God was mad at them and—unless they straightened up—they were going to fry!

One young man we filmed echoed this general theme when he sarcastically complained, “They gave me a pamphlet.  I read it, threw it in the garbage, and now I’m going to hell!  Isn’t that just great?”  Though the motives of the pamphleteers were no doubt noble, is it such a surprise that Christ’s message wasn’t getting through to this guy?  It may have worked for Jonah back in Old Testament days, but preaching God’s wrath against sinners in today’s streets is much more likely to get you ignored as an annoying kook than to produce sincere repentance.  We wonder why it’s so easy to miss the New Testament passage in Romans 2:4 that says God’s kindness leads to repentance.

Kindness flows more naturally, but if there is a word on the street about evangelism as it’s commonly practiced, that word is: Yuck!  And most of the Christians we’ve interviewed know it all too well.  Though they’ll often admit to feeling guilty for not sharing the gospel with their family and friends, in the very next breath those Christians will acknowledge that they’d much rather feel guilty for not evangelizing than alienating the people they care about.  Though preachers may attempt to shame and pressure Christians into doing it, they cringe at the very sound of the word evangelize.  Isn’t it weird that sharing the “good news” of Jesus has become “bad news” to both the intended recipients and to the messengers appointed to deliver it?

Pollster George Barna points out that though most Christians really want to show Christ’s love and bring hope to the lives around them, this is not always—or even usually—what others see.  He says, “Regardless of its true character and intent, the Christian community is not known for love or for a life-transforming faith. . .”  Think about it.  How evident are the seeds of Christ’s love in your life?  How often do your family and friends see—and experience—Christ’s love in you?

Seeds of love can often be little acts of kindness we don’t think much about at the time.  Dave [Ping] tells a story about the son of one of his fellow teachers back when he was teaching high school.

As I mentioned earlier in the readings, back when I was a high school teacher, my spiritual life wasn’t all that I wanted it to be.  Fortunately God doesn’t need spiritual giants to plant seeds.  I know this because of a phone call I got from Brad, the son of a fellow teacher I worked with during those days.  I was shocked when he thanked me for introducing him and his best friend, Jeff, to Christ.

“No way!” I said, “I’m thrilled to hear it, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t have anything to do with it.”  Then Brad explained that they both knew I was a Christian because I’d talked about Jesus with them from time to time.  But it was lots of little things I’d done—like giving them rides back and forth to school in my Triumph convertible, and lending them albums of the weird Scottish music I liked—that had made them hungry to find out more about a relationship with God.  Somehow these seeds I didn’t even know I was planting took root.  Now Brad has a beautiful Christian wife and family and his good friend Jeff has gone on to become a pastor.

God loves planting seeds in you and through you.  If you have Jesus in your life, you have a huge silo of seed ready for distribution.  In Reading 9 we talked about the humble Christians of Elderet, Kenya, who took a Saturday to clean up garbage from the streets.  To the extent that they did it with Christ’s love, they were flinging little seeds of God’s love all over town.  Of course one of the best places to begin flinging seeds is your own front lawn—that is, your closest relationships.

Be Indiscriminate

You’ll be excited to hear that you don’t have to be a salesman or even an extrovert to share Christ’s love—you just have to be a really good sower.  Perhaps that’s why after Jesus told the crowd the basics of sowing; he gave a detailed explanation of exactly what it meant.  We’re pretty sure it’s because he wanted us to know what to expect when we go out there and sow.  Here’s what he said:

“The seed that fell on the footpath represents those who hear the message about the Kingdom and don’t understand it.  Then the evil one comes and snatches away the seed that was planted in their hearts.  The seed on the rocky soil represents those who hear the message and immediately receive it with joy.  But since they don’t have deep roots, they don’t last long.  They fall away as soon as they have problems or are persecuted for believing God’s Word.  The seed that fell among the thorns represents those who hear God’s Word, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life and the lure of wealth, so no fruit is produced.  The seed that fell on good soil represents those who truly hear and understand God’s Word and produce a harvest of thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times as much as had been planted!”  (Matthew 13:19-23).

Notice that Jesus doesn’t tell you not to waste your seed on people whose hearts is concrete-hard pathways of misunderstanding.  As we’ve been saying throughout this book, God’s supply is so abundant that it’s inexhaustible.  Unfortunately, we keep on acting as if the seed of God’s love is in precariously short supply.  As a result, we sow carefully and sparingly.  This totally goes against the Bible’s clear teaching that, “Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously” (2 Corinthians 9:6, NIV).

There is no heavenly accountant toting up the number of conversions per dollar’s-worth of seed.  On the contrary, since there is an endless seed supply, Jesus clearly assumes you’re going to fling out lots and lots of Christ’s love into hearts that won’t grasp it before the Thief comes along and snatches it away.  You’re called to be such a prodigious, indiscriminate seed flinger that your love goes everywhere.  Of course, not every seed will produce a conversion.

Some of your seeds of love will go unnoticed—snatched away by the Thief before anyone even notices them.  And some of your loving actions will fall on hearts that are full of spiritual rocks—rocks that make it hard for faith to take lasting root.  Perhaps that person was betrayed by a church or has been wounded by a hypocritical Christian relative and his or her heart has been hardened.  Another person might be so caught up in the “thorns” of materialism and the anxieties of life that your seeds of love get choked before they can mature.  But there will be other times you’ll fling seeds of Christ’s love on soil that God—and his many other servants besides you—have been preparing for just such a moment.  And the seeds will take root and grow . . . and produce fruit.

Looking in from the outside, you can’t really tell what kind of soil is in somebody’s heart.  From the outside, both the authors of this book looked like they were totally closed and even hostile to the gospel.  Fortunately, that didn’t stop their family and friends from continually planting seeds of God’s love and acceptance in their lives.

The next four readings will help you learn some of the ins and outs of sowing Jesus’ love into the hearts of those closest to you.  Through small acts of kindness, listening, and sharing you can bring your family and friends closer and closer to a relationship with Jesus.  We’ll talk about practical ways to rebuild burnt relational bridges and to reopen doors that family members and friends have slammed shut.  We’ll also explain how to invite them to have their own, personal relationship with Jesus—when they’re ready.

Getting Your Feet Wet  (feel free to comment here or on the Reflection Pool questions)

What specific seeds of love and kindness have helped to bring you closer to God?

How might you sow similar seeds into the lives of your family and friends?  Or, to put it another way, what are some natural ways you can let Christ’s love overflow into the everyday activities you do with your family and friends?  Be as creative and specific as possible.

The Reflection Pool

What fears or hesitations come to mind when you imagine telling your family and friends about Jesus?

• What have your experiences of sharing Jesus’ love with your family and friends been like?
• How might “flinging seeds of Jesus’ love” change the way your unbelieving family members and friends think of Jesus?